Before we begin, we must understand
the context of the passage of Scripture we will reference. It speaks of the
Qualifications of the Pastor, but I believe the underlying principle does apply
to every disciple of Christ, for we are all ministers. The Pastor is a Minister to the Ministers
(Ephesians 4:11-12).
1
Timothy 3:1-7
1It is a trustworthy
statement: if any man aspires to the office of overseer, it is a fine work he
desires to do. 2 An overseer, then, must be above
reproach, the husband of one wife, temperate, prudent, respectable, hospitable,
able to teach, 3 not addicted to wine or pugnacious, but
gentle, peaceable, free from the love of money. 4 He must
be one who manages his own household well, keeping his children
under control with all dignity 5 (but if a man does not
know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of the church of
God?), 6 and not a new convert, so that he will not
become conceited and fall into the condemnation incurred by the devil. 7 And
he must have a good reputation with those outside the church, so that he
will not fall into reproach and the snare of the devil.
Ministry of every kind and every
nature is demanding when it comes to time especially when the minister of God
has a family. A minister must fulfill
his assignment, but not at the expense of his/her family. Paul was well aware
of the demands ministry would place upon believers and encouraged those who
were not married to refrain from marriage so as to devote more time to the
Lord’s work.
1
Corinthians 7:32-33
32 But I want you
to be free from concern. One who is unmarried is concerned about the things of
the Lord, how he may please the
Lord; 33 but one
who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how he may please his wife, 34 and his interests
are divided.
Problems often arise when believers
have little discipleship in regards to family and ministry. Over the years I have witnessed persons
struggling with the forgiveness of God through Jesus Christ. Typically they are new converts to the
Christian faith, but struggle with understanding how the Lord can be so
forgiving and allow the devil a foothold in their conscience as he constantly
bombards them with such statements as, “the Lord can’t forgive that,” or “He
won’t forgive that one, it was so bad.”
The worst of the devil’s tactics is convincing believers that they have
to work to make up for lost time or to pay back to God through works in the
Church the forgiveness that was freely given through the Blood of Christ.
One example was a young husband and
father that I met not long after my own conversion. He struggled with the forgiveness of his past
sins and believed he had to make up for them by working in the church. He became involved in many ministries of the
church, from helping park cars to showing up anytime work was being done around
the Church property. We had moved away
and after a year we returned to visit our old friends and had discovered his
wife had left the church, divorced her husband and left with their child,
because she felt that the church had become a mistress in their marriage.
This tragedy could have been prevented if
someone had stepped up to disciple the young man and his wife and provided
watchcare over the family and simply said “enough is enough, it’s time for
‘family time’.” This particular church
is what many would refer to as a “Mega-Church,” and such churches have much
work to do. When a Church begins to
absorb all the time of an individual it risks destroying the very family
relationships it hopes to build up.
This problem is by no means a large-church
problem, but an every-church problem when true biblical discipleship is lacking
and the people give into the false conviction of others, “that if you don’t do
it, it won’t get done, and what a shame that will be for the kingdom.” Every believer is a minister and must have a
philosophy regarding the family in ministry to protect their family from the
pitfalls of overworked ministers.
I have been blessed with a woman
called of God to be a pastor’s wife. She
understands the demands of ministry and knows that times come when I must go to
the hospital or minister to people during our “normal” family-time. She also knows that I am committed to my
family and will make up time lost at a later time. My wife also knows that if at any time she
feels that the family is hurting due to ministry she has the right to look her
husband in the eye and say, “time for ‘family time’.”
Every believer should have a place
of ministry in the Kingdom’s Work. As a part of that ministry, one must have a
philosophy of ministry regarding one’s family based upon the Scriptures to
guide them in protecting their family.
My Personal
Philosophy of the Family in Ministry
As a minister of God’s Word I am obligated by
God to care for my family, scripturally if I am found lacking as a husband and
as a father I am unqualified to serve as a pastor of God’s Church. As such, my Scriptural priorities are first
my God, second my family and third my service to God’s Church. Keeping these biblical priorities in their
order allows me to serve the Lord’s church even better with full confidence in
the blessing of the Lord and a clear conscience before God.
What is your Philosophy of the
Family in Ministry?
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